Funny emails, Inspiring emails and Amazing emails.

A Husband and wife had been arguing, when the husband, who did not realize he was driving too fast, was pulled over by a police officer for speeding
The officer says, ‘ I clocked you at 80 miles per hour, sir.’
The driver says, ‘Gee, officer, I had it on cruise control at 60. Perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating.’

MEN!!!!
One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his Sweatshirt.
Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, ‘What setting do I use on thewashing machine?’
‘It depends,’ I replied. ‘What does it say on your shirt?’
He yelled back, ‘ OHIO STATE ! ‘
And they say blondes are dumb….
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A couple is lying in bed. The man says, ‘I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world.’
The woman replies, ‘I’ll miss you………
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‘It’s just too hot to wear clothes today,’
Jack says as he stepped out of the …

A man and a friend are playing golf one day at their local golf course. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course. He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down in prayer.
His friend says: “Wow, that is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You truly are a kind man.”
The man then replies: “Yeah, well we were married 35 years.”
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This funny email …

For those who r Married as well as for those who wil get Married…..
Sharing a few thoughts for Would – be grooms
For Would-Be Grooms:
Rule.No.1 – Never compare your mamma’s cooking with your wife’s! There is no faster way to dig your own grave than that! Please understand that your mom’s cooking has the backing of 20 odd years of experience… ..don’t expect that from your wife whose hardly into the process! What if she were to compare your earning capacity with her dad’s!!! So shshshhhhh… ..!!!
Rule.No.2 : Never go out …

You love someone,
You marry someone else !
The one you marry becomes your spouse !
And the one you loved becomes …………..
the password of your email id !!

Men Are Just Happier People–
Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can never be pregnant.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal.
You don’t have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
People never stare at your chest when you’re talking to them.
New shoes don’t cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks and …

The Perfect Husband
Several men are in the changing room of a golf club. A mobile phone on a bench rings and a man engages the hands free speaker-function and began to talk.
Everyone else in the room stops to listen.
MAN: ‘Hello
WOMAN: ‘Darling, it’s me. Are you at the club?
MAN: ‘Yes
WOMAN: ‘I am at the shopping centre and found this beautiful leather coat. It’s only $1,000. Is it OK if I buy it?
MAN: ‘Sure ¦go ahead if you like it that much.
WOMAN: ‘I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the …

When a GIRL is quiet … millions of things are running in her mind.
When a GIRL is not arguing … she is thinking deeply.
When a GIRL looks at u with eyes full of questions …. she is wondering how long you will be around.
When a GIRL answers ‘ I’m fine ‘ after a few seconds … she is not at all fine.
When a GIRL stares at you she is wondering why you are lying.
When a GIRL lays on your chest .. she is wishing for you to be hers forever.
When …

WIFE VS. HUSBAND

A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not
saying a word.
An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither
of them wanted to
concede their position.
As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs the
husband asked sarcastically, “Relatives of yours?”
“Yep,” the wife replied, “in-laws.”

* WORDS**
A husband read an article to his wife about how many words
women use a day…30,000 to a man’s 15,000.
The wife replied, “The reason has to be because we have to repeat
everything to men…
The husband then turned to his wife and asked,
“What?”

CREATION
A …

Why girls don’t love software guys….?

 
:)
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This Email FWD by Dia Adtani
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